Gheebah: Backbiting

Archived under My Writings , Tazkiyyah .

Author: Umm Junayd

There are many diseases rampant within our Ummah which are dividing us and slowly killing us as a nation. One of the most dangerous, yet common of these diseases is backbiting.

In Arabic backbiting is referred to as ‘Gheebah’ which comes from the word ‘ghayaba’, which means something which is unseen. Here we can relate this to the action of backbiting; where a Muslims sees a fellow brother or sister committing an unlawful act and rather than advising him/ her, he speaks ill of the person to someone else while they are absent; hence the backbiter is unseen by the one who is being backbitten.

There is unanimous agreement amongst the scholars of Islaam that backbiting is haraam and therefore a major sin that, when committed, requires the Muslim to seek the forgiveness of Allaah (i.e. make tawbah).

The saddest thing about gheebah is that we fail to recognise that we are committing it.

Abu Huraira (radiAllaahu ‘anhu) narrated that the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wassallam) said, “Do you know what is backbiting?” They (the companions) said: “Allaah and His Messenger know best. Thereupon he (the Prophet) said: “Backbiting implies your talking about your brother in a manner which he does not like.” It was said to him: “What if what I say about my brother is true?” He said: “If what you said about him is true then you would have backbitten him, and if it is not true, then he is slandered (buhtaan) [Reported in Saheeh Muslim: hadeeth 1183]

It’s a great shame that we do not take heed to the teachings of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wassallam). He (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wassallam) told us that even if what we say about a Muslim brother/ sister is true, it is considered as backbiting and if it is false, it is slandering. Let us ask ourselves: how many times have we spoken ill of a brother or sister to others while the brother or sister we are speaking about is absent? Let us also ask ourselves: have we atoned for this sin? The answer to the latter question is most probably no, and this is exactly the reason why gheebah is so deadly - we never think to ask for forgiveness of the sin as it is taken so lightly. In order to atone for the sin of gheebah, we must pray for forgiveness of the one who was backbitten and also mention good of him/ her to those who heard the backbiting.

It should be known that the backbiter should be stopped immediately and should be warned that he/ she has committed in a great sin.
Also, the person who listens to the backbiter should be aware that he/ she is encouraging an evil if he/ she remains silent. Therefore, if the person does not stop backbiting, then he should warn them. If they still insist on backbiting, he should walk away from him, for the Prophet has said:

“He who amongst you sees something abominable should modify it with the help of his hand; and if he has not strength enough to do it, then he should do it with his tongue; and if he has not strength enough to do it, (even) then he should (abhor it) from his heart and that is the least of faith.”

... and ...

Abu Musa narrated that some people the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wassallam), "Whose Islam is the best? (i.e. who is a very good Muslim)?" He replied, "One who avoids harming the Muslims with his tongue and hands." [Reported in Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree: volume 1, hadeeth 10]

Let us take a look at a companion of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam), and how he feared for his tongue:

Abu Bakr as-Siddiq (radiAllaahu ‘anhu) narrated that one day when Umar went in to visit Abu Bakr as-Siddiq and found him pulling his tongue, he said, "Stop! May Allah forgive you!" Abu Bakr replied to him, "This has brought me down to dangerous places."

Not only has the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wassallam) warned us against backbiting, Allaah has also:

“O you who believe! Avoid immoderate suspicion, for in some cases suspicion is a sin. Do not spy on one another, nor backbite one another (to say something about another behind ones back that if one hears it, dislikes it). Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Surely you would abhor it. Fear Allaah; for Allaah is the Accepter of repentance, Merciful.” [Surah Al-Hujaraat (19): 12]

So, can we count how many times we have feasted on the flesh of a brother? It is something we’d never think of coming near, yet we don’t think twice before backbiting him.

Is it not astonishing how we tend to pick out the faults of others while we have not yet rectified the many faults we have in ourselves? It is too often that we, especially women, speak about others while we probably have more sins or faults than the one who is being spoken about.

Sisters! Remember that backbiting is a widespread disease amongst the Ummah as a whole; however, it seems to be most common amongst us women as we have a tendency to talk and gossip more than men. It seems that we tend to have more spare time to give a sister a ‘quick call’ which frequently ends in gossip, slander and backbiting.

Here are a few ways to avoid backbiting:

o Choose the right company! – This is very important as we are often caught in the trap of backbiting because others are doing it.

o Advice one another in private about any faults – this was you’ll be less likely to say it to others

o Show kindness and love to fellow Muslims – without this enmity will become rampant.

o Love for others what you love for yourself; if you don’t want to be backbitten, don’t do it to others!

Let us always keep the following words of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wasallam) in our minds:

"He who believes in Allah and the Last Day should speak that which is good or remain silent." [Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree: volume 8, no.157]