Writer’s Block…

… that’s what they call it when a writer is unable to make sense of thoughts bubbling in their mind and transfer them into comprehensible prose (or poetry). But that’s not what I call it. To me it’s voice unfound.

You see, there are times in life where you are so internally - and possibly externally - worn down that when you try to piece together a piece, not even a puff of air escapes. You may even call your own name… call your writing voice, because you’re sure that it must be there somewhere, but you hear no reply. And you sit there aghast: your writing voice has been lost!

*gasps*

Yes, that’s what I call it - voice unfound. When you lose something you try to find it, right? So when you are unable to write because your writing voice has gone on an unknown journey, you need to go out and find it. Well, that’s as far as I’ve come with my epiphany. Now I have to figure out just how I’m going to find it!

*thinks*…

You Are What You Say You Are

“I’m too lazy to lose weight,” “I’m not clever enough to teach my kids”, “I’m too fat to wear that dress…” Have you heard yourself saying similar statements before? Maybe you’ve heard another sister talking in such a way? These are
explosive assertions that are common on the tongues of women, and the question remains: why do we put ourselves down?

People tend to put themselves down for various reasons. For some it’s a matter of low self-esteem, where they’ve been told they are a certain way so many times that they’ve adopted it. For some, it is a sympathy ploy to get others to make a counter-claim. For others, it is an inherent fear that they will disappoint people if they do not surpass their expectations. Whatever the reasons may be, downgrading ourselves is unhealthy and can have adverse effects on our personae. I have seen many sisters who have been held back in their lives simply because of the way they think about themselves.

When you attach a definite trait to yourself, your actions begin to reflect that trait. When you say you’re too lazy to do something, you will behave lazily and fail to get things done. Likewise, if you say you’re not intelligent enough to pass a test, you won’t work to prove yourself otherwise for it is ingrained in your mind that you’re below par. The mind is a powerful thing, and the heart thrives on its thoughts.

Pumping your mind with damaging thoughts persuades your heart to feed on them and embrace them. It will not  willingly let them go until you do. The most dangerous aspect of putting yourself down is that it’s hard to break the cycle. Even though others may compliment you, your certainty that you are the complete opposite prevents you from freeing yourself of the negativity that weighs you down. These thoughts obstruct you from venturing forth and attaining your dreams; they are hurdles that you must jump in order to move ahead in life. Holding on to such beliefs, will cripple your mind and force you to live up to them. The sad reality is that you will remain undervalued until you discover the value within yourself.

Rather than degrading yourself, why not see yourself as a bird freeing itself from a cage of negativity? Once you spread your wings and fly into a world of endless opportunities by seeing your many positive attributes, you’ll find a flock of people wanting to fly with you to reinforce them with you.

Sister, you are what you say you are. Spread your wings and take flight on a journey to positive thinking.

This article was published in the Spring 2009 issue of SISTERS magazine.
© Umm Junayd, March 2009.